Library Cards

Rio needed to research Chinese Alligators for his endangered species report. Which made it the perfect time to take my kids to the library to get their very own library cards.

"Hi, how can I help you?" the librarian behind the return desk asked as she motioned for me to sit down in front of her.

"My kids would like to get their own library cards," I informed her.

"Okay, I just need to see their school ID cards," she said pleasantly.

I looked over at Amaya and Rio, and back at the librarian confused. "They're ten and seven," I pointed out the obvious. "They don't have school ID cards."

"All schools issue ID cards, ma'am," she said implying I was stupid.

Of course I had to correct her. The librarian then informed me of the new criteria for library card holders. She would need to see something with their name on it. The names written inside their jackets wouldn't do.

"Do they have a state issued ID card?" she asked.

I raised my eyebrows. "Again, they're kids. They don't have a State issued ID card." I spoke slowly so she would understand. I rummaged through my purse. "How about their insurance cards?"

"No, sorry, we can't accept those," she apologized.

I received the same answer when I inquired about the legitimacy of presenting their social security cards or their Smile Safe Kids card issued by the school.

"Do you have their Birth Certificates?" she asked.

"Sure...oh...wait..." I snapped my fingers. "I must of left them in my other purse along with my marriage license and bank statements," I teased sarcastically.

I thanked the librarian for my next blog topic. She didn't return the gratitude. Instead, she defended her position, and public library policies, by filling me in on an evil sneaky ring of parents, that have dozens of library cards issued to children that don't exist! Used with the intent to defraud the library! "So," she told me, "Being a tax payer, you should be grateful, it's your tax dollars we're protecting."

Clearly we were in the fiction section of the library.